In the competitive and fast-paced society we’re living in today, conflicts and clashes in relationships are simply inevitable. I’m sure you have had experienced conflicts with your colleagues, friends and even the loved ones in your life.

As a matter of fact, conflict is okay and it will happen at some point in life, nobody can avoid it. It’s how you handle the conflict that makes the difference. The way you deal with a conflict will either bring peace or create further conflicts.

Poor communications that result in misunderstandings are often the root cause of conflict. Therefore, effective communication skills are crucial when it comes to dealing with conflicts efficiently, fairly and resolutely.

Here are a few tips to help you improve your communication skills:

1. Shut Up and Listen.

When the other person is talking, pay attention and listen carefully! Most people are trying to interrupt when other person is talking or thinking what they’re going to say next. Next time when you’re communicationg with someone, try to shut up and listen when the other party is talking. Do not interrupt, do not judge and do not get defensive. Just listen!

Learn to paraphrase. When others finish talking or have expressed their opinions, restate what you’ve heard to show that you understand them. If you do not agree with the person, do not suggest that he or she is wrong. Acknowledge others’ opinions, share your views and then compare the differences objectively.

When you find agreements, build upon them. When you find differences or disagreements, compare them. That’s the foundation for effective communication.

2. Stay Focused on the issue at hand.

When you’re dealing with a conflict, do not try to bring up the past conflicts! Doing so will only create more conflicts. Stay focused on the present issue, try to understand one another and find a solution. Remember: Agree, Build and Compare differences.

3. If You’re Wrong, Own It!

Effective communication involves admitting when you’re wrong. Many of us see admitting wrong-doing is a weakness. Personal responsibility is a strength rather than weakness. When conflict arises, usually both party have their fair share. Stepping up to own your share of responsibility is magnanimous and can diffuse the situation immediately. It shows maturity in you and set a great example for others.

The courage to admit wrong-doing will make it safe for others to express their views and respond in kindness. This will more likely lead to mutual understanding and solution.

4. Think Win-Win.

When communicating in a conflict situation, think win-win! Instead of trying to win an argument, listen empathically to what other has to say first, then share your views. Focus on the things that both of you can agree upon, and build on it. Then, compare and compromise. Effective and healthy communication involve finding a solution that both sides can be happy with.

I hope these effective communication tips are useful for you.

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This entry was posted on Friday, December 19th, 2008 at 2:16 am and is filed under Communication Skills. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.