In the modern society we’re living in today, many of us treat failure as an embarrassment. This notion has been wedged in our minds since childhood. We have never been taught how to deal with failure objectively and productively, neither from our parents or teachers in school.
For example, you have just received an email from a company you had a job interview with last week. The email informs that you’ve not been selected for the job. Now, most people will view this as total failure on their part. But, do you really fail? Is it fair to view such situation as a total failure?
I think not if you can try to look at the situation from a more positive angle. Ask yourself these questions… are you a total failure? Or is it just your performance/skills that make you fail? These questions allow you to view the issue in a better perspective. If it’s my performance/skill that lets me down, how can I improve upon it?
See the difference? If you can calm yourself down and view your issue positively, you will be able to deal with it more objectively and productively. You will treat the failure as a learning opportunity to improve yourself.
NEVER EVER think that you fail as a person. This can plunge your self-esteem into the lowest level and make you feel very depressed. You will start to label yourself as a failure and generalize this to other situations.
You see, failure is not a permanent condition, it’s merely a jugdement from a view or an event. Instead of labelling or blaming yourself as a total failure, look at the causes of the failure. Most common causes of failure can be eliminated.
For example, one of the most common causes of failure is poor social or interpersonal skills. And since these are “skills”, they can be acquired and hence the causes can be eliminated. Some of the most important social skills are:
- being sensitive to other’s feelings
- being empathetic and sympathetic
- being emotionally stable
- able to listen to others empathetically
- able to understand how people feel and how groups function
- able to give directions clearly and effectively
- able to give constructive criticism
- able to take criticism constructively
Note that all these are skills that can be learned, practiced and improved.
Of course, there are many more causes of failure; which is beyond the scope of this article to discuss all. The main message I want you to take home from this article is to learn how to deal with failure more productively. Do not fear failure and do not label yourself as a failure.
All successful people are able to learn from their mistakes, give themselves an opportunity to survive the defeat and come out to be tougher and more resilient to face life challenges more effectively. As the saying goes… “Failure is the first step to success.”
Hope you find the tips or advice in this article useful.
-->
| | 
Subscribe to It!
This entry was posted
on Sunday, November 30th, 2008 at 11:49 pm and is filed under Self Help.
You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.
